I just read your post about 'what makes a perfect pair of breasts' and I'd like to know what a perfect penis looks like? All my ex-boyfriends tell me their penis was perfect but surely only one of them is right? If at all?
I say that a perfect penis is the kind of penis that isn’t on anyone’s forehead. It sounds like all your ex-boyfriends had one up there as well as one down there. It must have been awkward walking next to someone with a penis so visible. Sorry about that.
Dear Angry Agony Aunt,
Why does my Aunt hate me after I sung on stage?
I want to reassure you it’s because you’re a terrible singer but I think it’s more than that. I think your Aunt hates you because your mother (her sister) is a dirty, filthy whore. Your Aunt obviously busted your Mum pashing your Uncle backstage while you were butchering ‘New York, New York’. All the best Britney.
Dear Angry Agony Aunt,
My friend had lunch with this girl every Friday and my friend has now left the company. At his farewell drinks they both bullied me into becoming her new weekly lunch date. How do I get out of it?Who needs enemies when you’ve got friends? Think about why your friend left the company in the first place. Sure, he said it was because he was offered more money somewhere else but I’m guessing the answer lays square on a Friday.
But having said that, you eat lunch right? You also eat lunch on a Friday? Well, I really don’t see what the problem is. Sure, you may be talked at for sixty minutes but I say suck it up. Enjoy the hour of being talked at. After all, it’s good practice for when you get married one day.
