Dear Angry Agony Aunt
How do I tell my boss I want a pay increase?
Turning up for work is always a good start. I know that remembering directions each and every work day is confusing and exhausting. I mean, there’s streets and cars and people and crossing signals… Look left, look right and those strange zebra like markings on the road… Also, how do you REALLY know if the green man or the red man your friend? And what about this business about north, east, south, west? If the sun’s to your right, is it morning or afternoon??? Whew. It’s hot and sweaty work…
And just to cap it off, public transport presents a whole different range of problems. Is the train travelling in the right direction? Is this the bus stop? (The sign is a give away). How do ferry’s float? Sometimes even your map, GPS and timetable doesn’t help you out. And forget asking strangers for directions to work. You’d be better off asking them for a dollar than asking them ‘where's that place I was at yesterday during business hours?’
Then finally, if you’re lucky enough to make it to work (what a stroke of luck!) you have to remember what floor you work on. There’s only five to chose from and after level hopping, you’ve found an area that looks familiar to you - but you can’t be quite sure if it’s where you work. It’s not until you see the sign ‘Your desk is here Tracey’ do you realise you’ve made it. How you haven’t got that pay rise is just mind boggling.
So my advice is quite simple. Go ahead and tell your boss you want a pay increase. I'm sure they'd find it the funniest part of their day. However, be prepared for your boss to fire you and frogmarch you out of the building. And do you know the worst part of that is? You’ve now gotta remember how to get home…
Send your questions to me - angryauntis@gmail.com
